California Bar Releases February 2012 Results

Where’s the Stork?

ATTORNEY: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th? WITNESS: Yes. ATTORNEY: And what were you doing at that time? WITNESS: Duh………….

No, I wasn’t there.

ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken? WITNESS: Would you repeat the question?

Asleep or Dead. Ask me in the morning.

ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn’t it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn’t know about it until the next morning? WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam?

Where am I, Cathy?

ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning? WITNESS: He said, “Where am I, Cathy?” ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you? WITNESS: My name is Susan.

Sorry…I forget!

ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all? WITNESS: Yes. ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory? WITNESS: I forget. ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot?

Gear or Shift?

ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact? WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.

Hatching!

ATTORNEY: What is your date of birth? WITNESS: July 18th. ATTORNEY: What year? WITNESS: Every year.

Don’t touch me!

ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active? WITNESS: No, I just lie there.